*the unedited rantings of a fat 43 year old menopausal ex -talk show host * -married mother of four- read at your own risk - my spelling sux (add * ocd * adhd * lmnop * suv * dvd * y not me)

3/22/2005

toronto

my tubby toe dips in
testing
a joke - a blog
how much is too much

at the airport - a young dad
holding a screaming baby
6 or 8 months i guessed
watching her yell

kel said don't

i see 3 moms stop
ask if he needs help
no he says
as she throws her head back
she is crazed - he is confident

ro - kel whispers again
the ticket woman says it
"doesn't he have a binky"
and off we go
talking about not knowing if we should
but wanting to
so

a male security guard stops
do you need a nurse he asks
the kid had some lungs
no again

moms think they know better

i go
kel looks away
how does she put up with me
hi i say tentatively
he nods
are you ok i ask him
yes he says
i have four kids
he nods again
ok - i go

wishing i hadn't

so we r at r gate
reading anne lamott's newest
plan b
amazing as always

i see a mom with a stroller
it's the same baby
almost asleep
she says hi first
a relief

we talk as moms do
she is a nurse
who had just come back from antarctica
an ice station
she was gone for 2 1/2 weeks
dad took care of the baby
alone
while she was away

i shared my angst
about trying to "help"
her hubby
she said she would have too
i love women

as we boarded r plane
he came over
dad - introduced himself
i love men

waiting to board
a handsome hulk
in a wheelchair
car accident - dead from the chest down
his will to live - i asked
his mom he said
pushing him - his sassy wife
met 8 yrs ago - 8 yrs after
"i picked him up" she winked

connect always connect

kel has been waiting
she waits a lot - she is better at it then me
at the plane entrance
a newborn in a car seat
beautiful hawaiian looking mom
he's stunning i say
thanks she says no smile
how old i ask - 3 months
she turns away

kel over heard her
b4 i got there
that woman hates rosie o'donnell
she is sure

seated a bunch of brown baby beauties pass
12 - 9 - 5
"look it's the beautiful family"
they laugh - kids get it
mom was away
a pilot in viet nam
dad lead them down the aisle
laughing and proud

comments r gone
poof - b4 the blog
became a drog
4 me

full disclosure -
i spell checked antarctica